Being Human
by Doug Shapiro
Oh, Savvy Actors, you’ve felt the tunnel vision. You’re with a group of other theatre professionals, chatting away about things that are important to you in your chosen profession, and you start to feel the whirlpool of negative theatre talk suck your soul into the abyss but you just. can’t. stop. yourself. You become the person you’re always complaining about.
I’ve been there and I’m going to bring you back a few years to my Boston acting days. (cue time change music)
There I was in the green room of Foothills Theatre in Worcester MA, participating with my fellow actors in the usual gripes about The Industry. (It’s more fun if you read the following using your hands as talking puppets.)
“Casting Directors only see us a certain way.”
“Boston theaters will only hire New York actors for leads.”
“Only a handful of Boston actors get all the roles in town.”
We were working ourselves up into the regular tizzy about the hopelessness of it all, when in walks the fabulous actor Cheryl McMahon.
“Boy, did I have a time making school lunches for my kids today. They’re twins. You’d think they’d want the same thing!”
It was like we had been drowning and suddenly broke the surface. Our shoulders melted down from our ears where they had been lodged and we breathed in Cheryl’s tale from the world outside of theatre.
(cue time change music back to the present)
The lesson I take from Cheryl is that people want to hear about LIFE. Yes, we are passionate about our art. Yes, we work our tails off in order to be absolutely prepared when opportunity presents itself. Yes, the product we sell is incredibly close to ourselves because it IS ourselves. But when The Biz is all we talk about, we’re missing the opportunity to develop, create, and maintain real relationships.
Let’s kick this up a notch and apply this to an agent interview situation. Put yourself in the agent’s shoes as they ask the actor the ultimate question:
“So, tell me about yourself.”
Okay, Mr. or Ms. Agent, which response is more appealing to you?
Choice A: “I’m so passionate about acting. I graduated from Syracuse University with a degree in music theatre, acted in Boston for seven years and got into the unions, and then came to New York to work on Broadway.”
Choice B: “I’m the youngest of three and my mom soon learned that if she put me in front of Muppets and Looney Tunes, I would be content and she was free to wrangle my two older sisters. As a result, I developed a huge love for the vaudeville comedy on which those shows were based and today I can’t get enough of old-time radio comedy shows. Whenever I can, I’ll sneak off to the Museum of TV and Radio and watch old Muppet Shows.”
My guess is that you snored your way through Choice A, even though it’s genuine, because it fails to set me apart from everyone else that comes into the office. It might actually be interesting to someone outside our profession, but if I want to really share my essence with someone inside our profession, I’d want to go with choice B.
So, the next time you’re sitting across from an agent or waiting with the usual suspects at an audition and someone asks you how you’re doing, spare them the resume. Talk about the recipe you’re trying. The book you’re reading. The walk you took the other day. Then, be genuinely curious as you ask them about themselves and actively listen to what they have to say. That’s how you build relationships. That’s being human.
I haven’t seen Cheryl McMahon in over ten years, but she remains at the forefront of my mind and I’d work with her again in a heartbeat. Go forth, Savvy Actors, and be the Cheryl McMahon in your next conversation.
